“I don’t know what’s wrong, I just know that I’m not happy!” How often have we heard — or spoken — these words? It is very odd that, given the affluence of our nation, we struggle so often to find happiness. It isn’t that we’re not trying — we will grasp at anything that promises happiness, whether it’s losing weight or getting another college degree or buying a new car. In the end, however, we usually feel unsatisfied. Aren’t we supposed to be happy — especially around the holidays?
God created us for happiness! Our bodies purposefully, by design, release endorphins when we’re happy! Happy people live longer and happy people have a higher sense of self-worth. With so much unhappiness around us, how do we nurture a greater sense of happiness?
First, it’s fine to admit we’re unhappy. Many times, we settle for unhappiness rather than admitting to other people that we’re not happy. It feels like we’re admitting failure. If we can move beyond the discomfort of acknowledging unhappiness, we will discover the freedom to make different choices; it is within the changes that freedom offers, that happiness may be found. We can even pray to God that we are unhappy!
There are many ways to find happiness when we realize that we possess the liberty to choose them. One of these paths is to rethink our goals. Ask someone to list their goals and we know what’s coming next: retire well, finish school, save money, lose some pounds, etc. Goals such as these are both long-term and vague. When will we realize that we have retired well? Maybe we will sit up from our rocking chair when we’re 80 and suddenly announce, “I just retired well!” When will we think we’ve saved enough money or lost enough weight? Do we really believe another college degree will unlock happiness?
Research indicates that vague, long-term goals leave us uncertain (was the goal really met?) and less happy than we envisioned. Happiness is found in meeting short-term, achievable goals and enjoying the moment! Try asking yourself this: “What is the one thing I would like to do for myself today?” Your answer is your goal and happiness is realized in its accomplishment. My goal for today could be to call a good friend, eat at my favorite restaurant, go for a long walk, finish reading a book, or watch my favorite movie. Happiness is usually brief, measured in hours, minutes, and even sometimes in a moment — so why not scatter multiple happy moments throughout your day? Long-term goals are good and necessary, but let’s not ignore the need for bits of joy along the way!
Jesus once said, “Do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” In our culture we’ve simplified this wisdom to read, “Take one day at a time.” In between the hard work and effort of today, take some time to find some happiness, as well — set a little goal, achieve it, and enjoy the moment!
