New year, time to check relationships

As the new year begins, many of us wake up with a painful reminder of all the healthy living plans we had committed to last year that were left by the wayside.

Grabbing our smartphones, we may download apps or look for online remedies to get another jump start on feeling better. We look for weight loss apps, fitness apps, smoking cessation apps, hangover cures, etc. We will find loads of apps that make many promises but, like our resolutions, are easily put away and forgotten until the next year comes roaring in.

Some promises, though, are not so easily forgotten — like our promises to support the well-being of our partners, spouses and children. The conflicts that occur remind us of how far we may have fallen off track with our relationships and cause us as much pain as the physical symptoms of forgoing our healthcare.

Like our end of year health check-ups (or PT tests), it’s important to do a relationship check-up to monitor how you and your partner’s needs are being met together.

(When doing a relationship check-up, remember that all relationships will find “love handles” that may need to be smoothed out for a better fit or celebrated as part of the relationship shape.)

Relationship check-up questions

Has your relationship gotten fat with past resentments? Has it gotten lazy in its efforts to be more than just functional, but to actually feel good? Do you like what you see about your relationship when reflecting on your behaviors together? Can you trust it to run the long mile even in a course filled with hurdles and challenges? Are you experiencing an aching heart for something that used to be or sudden selective deafness when your partner speaks?

Maybe the symptoms are more severe, like blindness to the qualities that made your partner the “one.”

All of these may be signs of a worsening relationship condition. But, awareness is the first step toward wellness. Like the numerous health resources available, relationship resources are also available to help you improve or maintain the health of your relationship.

Base resources

Family advocacy program: FAST Counseling, New Parent Support Program, Relationship and Parenting classes and support groups are available. For more information or to make an appointment, call 623-856-3417.

Military One Source: Telephonic services and referrals are available at 800-707-5784.

Airman & Family Readiness Center: Non-clinical counseling services, classes, referrals are available at 623-856-6550.

The Chapel: Non-clinical counseling is available at 623-856-6211.

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